What’s more important?
Being loved for being yourself, or for the things you do for others?
In all honesty, I might be stuck. One of my biggest stresses and frustrations in life is doing so much for others without help nor acknowledgment in return. When always being the one who takes care of everything, always, without being asked, it places you on a pedestal. Then the minute you slip or fall or hesitate (as humans always do), you are automatically seen as not good enough. Not keeping up, not performing, not doing what you should.
Do you see those people putting up happy pictures with “Happy Birthday to my wifey” messages on Social Media? They always say the same thing.
“Thanks for all you do for us!”
I see this and I think….That’s it?
I don’t know is about you, but I would like to be praised for being me, far more than the jobs I do for people. I’m a parent FFS, I have to do those jobs! I’m a human being, I need to help others when I can. That should be basic humanity 101 for every person on the planet.
That said, I do want to be thanked for my hard work, but I don’t think this should be promoted nor given in place of appreciating me for who I am and the joy I can bring to someone else’s day.
I don’t get told very often how much people like me, just because I’m me. So when it happens, it’s kind of weird.
So, what do I want to be loved for?
- For being a nice person.
- For my quick wit, excellent sense of humour and the ability to deliver incredibly intelligent sarcastic comments at just the right times.
- For always being direct, down to earth & easy to talk too. For being able to laugh at myself and to take well-directed hits with humour and grace.
- To be able to read situations and people and know how to deal with each and every individual one.
- For being tough, fiercely independent and as subtle as a kick in the ass.
- For always being my authentic self.
I don’t want to be only known as a good worker, or be limited in my abilities as a good mother or a good partner by the day to day things I do to take care of my family. That’s just my job, it’s not who I am.
Sometimes, spending time in someone’s company just because they are nice, not for what you get from them or what they want from you, really is awesome. When you click with people, you get along like a house on fire, you understand them, you can work well with them, you can have a laugh with them, or you just can relax in their company.
Sometimes its totally unexpected.
Sometimes it’s not what you are looking for.
Although sometimes, it might be just what you need.
Needed to prove to yourself you really are a nice person. You are clever and funny and intelligent. That you are worth knowing and loving because of the parts of you that sparkle and shine, not just the part that remembers to put the washing on every day.
It makes for great relationships, it makes you happier as a person and it lets you relax.
It lets you be yourself.
So how do you want to be loved?
For the jobs you do? For the day to day things you have to do?
Or for just being you?
I think I know what I want.
Just Be You, Everyday
