Who Are You?
It seems a simple question to answer, but actually – it’s not.
When I first went through the process of “trying to work out who I was” I came out with a whole heap of things like “I’m a mum”, “I’m an EA”, “I run a business”, “I sell candles”, I take care of people”, “I’m a mentor”.
A lot of these things explain what I do. I am a business owner, I am a mum. However, they don’t define me as a person, they just help explain the things that I do on a daily basis.
There are a lot of things in life that have nothing to do with who you are, such as:
- Your job
- How much money you earn/have
- Where you live
- Where you went to school
- If you have a Uni degree or not
- What you look like
For me, it took a lot of discussion and pondering and asking questions and saying things like “but I am!”, to help me to understand that the point here is not who you are as in what you do, but who you are as a person. Not who as in Danni the mum or Danni the business owner, but who as in Danni – she’s’ always supportive. Danni – she’s always working hard, Danni – she’s thoughtful, Danni – she helps others.
What defines you is your actions, your level of respect for others, your personal happiness and satisfaction in life, your positivity and your mindset. In short, you can call that the essence of you.
So how do you know who other people really are?
I don’t think it takes too long to understand others. I’m sure you see some people and know the type of person they are straight away. It’s obvious in how they act, how they respect others and their positive mindset and approach to life. They are genuine, they are being authentic to themselves and to others, and it shows.
There’s also people on the flip side (and I’m sure you know them) people who you think…”So & So?….jeez what a dickhead!!”. That’s the essence of them. Their actions, their respect levels, their kindness factor, their mindset – paints them just as they are. i.e. not a very nice person. Now, in all honesty, if these people ARE being genuine, they ARE being Authentic, and they ARE happy being the way that they are – it’s not up to you to change them. The only thing I suggest in this case, is to stay away. No one needs that type of person in their life. They will drag you down. Trust me on this!!
Another difficult thing to work through when looking at who you are is that quite often we find that we are ingrained into thinking or seeing ourselves in a certain way. This could be due our upbringing (not feeling emotionally supported or constantly being compared to others), our religious views (feeling constantly guilty about not being perfect or doing the “right thing”), or perhaps having been been manipulated by others (in an emotional way, often over many years) into believing what is not true, all of which often end up with the same outcomes. Feelings that we are not important, and that our thoughts and opinions don’t matter. This being the case, it’s incredibly hard to shift our mindset into a positive one and start seeing ourselves for who we really are.
It’s not healthy to view yourself the way other people see or define you. The essence of ourselves should never be defined by other peoples opinions. We need to work on separating our self worth from the expectations of others.
Forget your daily persona and start focussing on you as a person.
Who is Danni?
I am just a nice person. I’m learning to accept being imperfect and living with struggle. I make mistakes. I care for, and respect others and delight in others doing well. I’m actually happy! I know that I’m authentic & genuine and I’m comfortable removing those from my life who are not. I am enough.
Who Are You?
Just Be You, Everyday